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Day Number One Hundred and Twenty-One



"The Time that I've wasted is my biggest regret, Spent in these places I will never forget. Just sitting and thinking about the things that I've done the crying, the laughing , the hurt , the fun."


It's been forever and a half. And yet, every time I come back to this journal. I've found so many bad memories. yes there are good ones, but so many more bad. I always go back and read how horrible my typing, spelling, grammar, etc was. I look at all the horrible things I said about people, mostly my family, and I'm amazed I ever felt that way. I see the stupid things I thought and I wish that I could be capable of going back and telling my younger, stupid self not to make the decisions I made. Not to go through with those choices. But. Then I wouldn't be here would I? In my last post I gave a recap of how my life has changed. I thought those were big changes? God I wonder how I'll top my new changes in the coming months. I went from hating my brother for not looking after Lily, to asking him to live with me when things went downhill for him. He's proven himself an honorable father, and an amazing younger brother. I kept Lily and even got a second bunny, Butters. I have two of the best dogs I could ever ask for, Lucky, my border collie, and Marty Mcfly, my shih tzu. I have a kick ass job at a puppy store. One I could only ever dream of having. I'm finally getting out of the shit hole apartments I couldn't wait to move into over a year ago. I miss the hell out of my Leo friends and wish i had just stuck with my communication major. Jon has shown me just how much of amazing a true best friend can be. I've come to be on great terms with both of my parents, as well as Sal. And I'm finally in a relationship where I actually feel wanted, needed, desired, and most importantly, like the only girl he wants. All in all, I couldn't ask for more. I don't remember the last time I can honestly say I was truly happy. It makes me want to start a new blog as a way to remember the "good" years. Instead of the ones captured in this blog. However, I'm tired, I'm heading home tomorrow for mom's birthday, so I think I'll just head to bed instead :)

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